You know you live in a small town
- It has an aquarium -- stocked with a live minnows
- The town newspaper is published monthly
- The town is named after EVERYONE'S distant relative.
- It was founded on April Fools' Day as a practical joke.
- The Ice Cream store has only two flavors, chocolate and vanilla.
- There's no hospital -- only a first aid kit
- For fun on Saturday nights, people drive up and down main street.
- There's no bank... as soon as someone gets enough money, they leave.
- The only traffic jam's are caused when a farmer drives down Main Street on
- The local phone book has only one yellow page.
- Hardware, Dry Goods, Grocery, Clothing and farm supplies are all sold at
the same store.
- Third Street is on the edge of town
- You don't signal turns because everyone knows where you're going, anyway.
- No social events are scheduled when the school gym floor is being
- You call a wrong number and they supply you with the correct one.
- Everyone knows all the news before it's published
- People read the paper to see whether the publisher got the facts right.
- The city limits signs are both on the same post.
- McDonalds only has one Golden Arch
- The 7-11 is only open from 8 - 5.
- The only road crossing Main Street is a dirt road.
- The New Year's baby was born in October.
- The one-block-long Main Street dead ends in both direction
- There's no place to go that you shouldn't
- "Night on the Town" takes only 11 minutes
- At the last beauty contest, nobody won 2nd or 3rd.