- Dim your
headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded and the deer is in sight.
approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of
tow another car using pantyhose and duct tape.
sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back
relieve yourself from a moving vehicle, especially when driving.
- Do not
remove the seats from the car so that all your kids can fit in.
- Do not
lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.
||Unlike clothes and
shoes, a toothbrush should never be a hand-me-down item.
||If you have to vacuum
the bed, it's time to change the sheets.
||While ears need to be
cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck
||Plucking unwanted nose
hair is time-consuming work. A cigarette lighter and a small tolerance for pain can
accomplish the same goal and save hours.
Note: Its a good idea to keep a bucket of water handy when using this method.
Remember to leave a generous tip for good service. After all, their
mobile home costs just as much as yours.
Redneck Etiquette - ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME
A centerpiece for the table should never be anything prepared by a
Do not allow the dog to eat at the table . . . no matter how good his
If your dog falls in love with a guest's leg, have the decency to leave
them alone for a few minutes.
babies should be taken to the lobby and picked up immediately after the movie has ended.
from talking to characters on the screen. Tests have proven they can't hear you.
is usually a poor choice for a wedding gift.
- Its is
not okay for the groom to bring a date to a wedding.
dancing, never remove undergarments, no matter how hot it is.
- A bridal
veil made of window screen is not only cost effective but also aproven fly deterrent.
- For the
groom, at least rent a tux. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can
create a natty appearance. Though uncomfortable, say yes to socks and shoes for this
take a beer to a job interview or ask if they press charges.
identify people in your yard before shooting at them.
say "Excuse me" after getting sick in someone else's car.
considered tacky to take a cooler to church.
- Even if
you're certain that you are included in the will, it's considered tacky to drive a U-Haul
to the funeral home.
socially refined never fish coins out of public toilets, especially if other people are
provide an alibi to the police for family members.