You Might Be a High-Tech Redneck If...
- If your e-mail address ends in ".over.yonder.com."
- If you connect to the World Wide Web via a "Down Home Page."
- If the sticker on your computer says, "My other computer is a laptop."
- If your laptop has a sticker that says, "Protected by Smith and Wesson."
- If your baseball cap reads "DEC" instead of "CAT."
- If your computer is worth more than all your cars combined.
- If your wife said either she or the computer "had to go," and you still don't
- If you've ever used a CD-ROM as a coaster for your beer.
- If you ever refer to your computer as "Ole Bessy."
- If your screen saver is a bitmap image of your favorite truck, tractor, or farm animal.
- If you start all your e-mails with the words: "Howdy y'all!"
- You've ever brought your laptop to a Tractor Pull.
- When your friends comment on your "nice boots" and you say "Yea, thanks.
Its my spiffy, new Phoenix BIOS."
- When you're honked off at your computer warranty because it doesn't cover damage from
- When your computer toolkit contains a pitch fork.
- When your MS-DOS boot menu contains an entry called, "Cow Tipping
- If you've ever been to "http://www.hee-haw.com."
- When your wife catches you again with your "Farm Animals of the Orient"
- When you order your new pick-up truck with a gunrack and PCMCIA sockets.
- When, in a pinch, you use your laptop battery to jump-start the Combine.
- When you have 17 different versions of DOOM, but you still can't write your name.
- If you've ever doubled the value of your truck by installing a cellular phone with modem
and fax option.
- If you know that NORTON UTILITY isn't a power company.